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sapphire_childTitle: Of Honey Sandwiches and Marmalade
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG
Characters: Ten, Rose, Jackie
Genre: angst, fluff
Spoilers: Set somewhere between Love and Monsters and Fear Her.
Summary: On one of their trip back to Earth to visit Jackie, the Doctor has a strange reaction to the sandwiches she serves up for them and Rose follows him to make sure he’s alright.
Disclaimer: Doctor Who and all associated characters/situations etc do not belong to me, I’m just borrowing them. Also, Time Lords do smell like honey according to this site which is pretty bloody comprehensive so I'm going to go with it.
~*~
“It’s a bit nice isn’t it?”
Rose Tyler’s brow puckered as she leant against her the doorway to her mothers kitchen, arms and legs crossed nonchalantly. “What’s nice?”
“You two coming to visit me all the time,” Jackie said fondly as she slathered a knife with butter and began spreading it liberally onto the bread she’d lined up across the counter. “He never used to like visiting when he was old big ears.”
“He was different then,” Rose shrugged and glanced over her shoulder at the Doctor who was methodically pulling apart the television remote, specs on and tongue between his teeth. “He doesn’t seem to mind doin’…domestic stuff so much now.”
“Domestic?” Jackie scoffed as she put the butter away and set to the honey jar with rather more force than necessary. Several pieces of bread began to break apart as she slapped the condiment across them. “Like an alien can be taught to be more human! You make him sound like he’s some sort of stray cat you’ve brought in off the street.”
“But he is.” Rose insisted and Jackie paused in her sandwich preparation to stare. “More human I mean, not like a stray cat.” Rose clarified as Jackie began pressing pieces of bread together.
“Well I can’t complain about havin’ you round a bit more.” she said as she transferred the sandwiches she’d made onto a tray and heading into the lounge room. “Though I could do with a bit more warning – I’ve got nothing in the house. And,” she added pointedly to the Doctor. “I could also do with a bit less of him tryin’ to break the TV remote.”
The Doctor glanced up vaguely at this pointed address and then returned to his work.
“It’s just a simple little upgrade.” he said as he aimed his sonic screwdriver at the battery compartment. “Nothing for to worry about.”
“What like the upgrade you gave the microwave last time?” Jackie demanded as she plopped down into the nearest chair. “It nearly burnt the whole flat down!”
“I told you not to cook asparagus in there.” the Doctor said curtly, making a supreme effort to try and concentrate on his work whilst Jackie began to berate him, the two of them talking one on top of the other.
“You did not! An’ you never told me…”
“I did so! Jackie Tyler…”
“…that it’d melt my favourite Tupperware container either! Don’t know how Rose puts up with you, blowing things up all the time...”
“I told you in no uncertain terms that you shouldn’t put asparagu-and who says I blow things up…?”
Rose tuned the two of them out as they bickered and reached for a sandwich. Hoping to reconcile the two of them before they really got going she pushed the tray down the coffee table towards them as a peace offering.
“You two gonna eat somethin’?” she asked. “Or are you just gonna bicker like a pair of kids all afternoon?”
“Oh no thanks sweetheart I just had lunch,” Jackie said, demeanor changing instantly. “These are all for you two.”
Rose choked on a mouthful. “Mum there’s enough sandwiches here to feed an army!”
“Close your mouth while you’re eating,” Jackie chided her daughter automatically. “I don’t want to see your food thanks very much.”
The Doctor grinned at Rose’s face as she chewed the rest of her mouthful sulkily.
“Why exactly did you make so many sandwiches?” he asked.
“What, with the way you eat?” Jackie scoffed.
“Oi!”
“Well it’s true!” Jackie told him. “I’ve never seen anyone eat like you do. Don’t know where you put it all, you’re that skinny. Bottomless pit is what you are.”
“No such thing as a bottomless pit,” the Doctor corrected her even as he put down the TV remote and his sonic and reached for a sandwich. “And I should know – I’ve fallen down a fair few in my…”
He froze suddenly, sandwich not quite touching his lips and the smile on his face dropped instantly.
Rose stopped eating too, sensing the change in his demeanour almost immediately. “Doctor?” she said gently as he pulled the sandwich away from his mouth and stared at it like it was poisoned. “You alright?”
“What?” he blinked and then abruptly put the sandwich down. “Oh course I’m alright. Just...need a bit of fresh air is all. Might go for a quick walk. Don’t go anywhere – I’ll be back!”
As he spoke he sprang to his feet and backed hurriedly out of the room. Seconds later the front door clicked open and then shut again with rather more force than was necessary.
The two women sat in stunned silence for a moment before Jackie finally spoke up.
“What the hell was that about?” she wondered. “He’s a bit...flaky now isn’t he?”
“He’s not flaky mum.” Rose defended him instantly, rising to her feet. “I’d better go make sure he’s alright.”
“Maybe he doesn’t like multigrain?” Jackie said thoughtfully, eyeing the discarded sandwich. “He’s not allergic to butter or something daft is he?”
Rose did her best not to roll her eyes. “Mum.”
“Oh alright,” Jackie sighed and waved her daughter away. “Just make sure you come say goodbye before you go swanning off again in that machine of his.”
“I will.” Rose promised, bending down to kiss her mother on the cheek. “Promise.”
At the door Rose paused and glanced back down the hall to where her mother was surveying her newly tinkered-with television remote suspiciously. Smiling, Rose slipped outside and glanced up and down the balcony.
The Doctor hadn’t gone far, only retreating a short way down the balcony before he had stopped. He was leaning against the railing with one foot crossed over the other with his eyes focused on some faraway point. As she padded down to lean up against the railing with him his eyes came back into focus briefly before glazing over again and she knew that he was aware of her.
“Alright?” she said after a moment and he nodded curtly. Uncertain as to where to go from there, Rose blurted. “Mum wanted to know if you were allergic to butter.”
The Doctor turned to her, one eyebrow raised. “Seriously?”
“Seriously.” Rose said, trying her best not to smile and failing as he broke into a grin. They laughed together quietly for a moment, both caught up in the ridiculousness of the situation.
“I’m not allergic to butter,” the Doctor said finally, sobering slightly. “That’s not...” trailing off, he shuffled his feet awkwardly and then drummed his fingers against the metal railing. “Never mind.”
“Well if it wasn’t the butter then it must’ve been the bread,” Rose teased gently, bumping his shoulder in an effort to try and soften him up. “Am I right? Don’t like multigrain? All those little bits getting stuck in your teeth...”
“It was the honey,” the Doctor interrupted unexpectedly. Glanced sideways at her. Stared back out at nothing. “It took me by surprise is all, I wasn’t...expecting it.”
Rose paused to process this new information. “You’re...allergic to honey?”
The Doctor laughed softly and his eyes dropped to his hands as he shook his head. “No.”
“Well what then?”
He turned and considered her briefly. “Have you ever smelt me?”
Rose couldn’t help herself. She stared at him, mouth hanging slightly open. Of all the things he could have said to her she certainly hadn’t been expecting that.
“Well?” he prompted and Rose snapped out of her reverie.
“Well not like...deliberately or anythin’,” she mumbled. “I mean sometimes when we hug I sor’ of...you know. But not...I mean I don’t go round sniffing your shirts or anythin’.”
He eyed her a little strangely at the last comment but then he turned and spread his arms wide as though to embrace her and nodded his consent.
“Smell me.”
Rose goggled at him. “Serious?”
“Serious.” he said and waited patiently while she dithered awkwardly in front of him, uncertain as to how exactly she should go about fulfilling his request. After several seconds had passed and she still hadn’t made a move, he tried for a joke. “I don’t bite.”
Rose laughed and, awkwardness breaking down, she stepped forward to put her arms around him and drew him into a hug, pressing her face against the soft lapel of his brown coat.
“Now,” the Doctor said, wrapping his arms around her in turn. “What do I smell like to you?”
Feeling ridiculous, Rose breathed in deeply.
“Like...fabric softener,” she began. “Um...sor’ of...metally? And like the inside of the TARDIS – like...like time and stars I...dunno how else to...um...an’ dust? You smell like dust an’ books.”
“What else?” he prompted and Rose breathed in again tentatively.
“I...I dunno,” she faltered and tried to pull away but he tightened his hold on her slightly and touched the back of her head. “Doctor?”
“Try here,” he said and tilted her head so that her nose was pressed into his neck and suddenly an impossibly sweet smell filled her senses.
“Honey!” she blurted, surprised. “I never really noticed before but...you do, you smell like honey!”
“Welll...it’s not quite the same,” he consented, letting his arms drop enough that she could pull back and look up at him. “But yes it is a very similar scent to honey.”
“I never even realised,” Rose shook her head in amazement. “I mean, I guess you always smelt sor’ of...sweet but I never realised...”
“It’s my hormones.” he told her. “Or at least the Time Lord equivalent or hormones. It’s also part of the reason why I don’t sweat much – my body automatically cleanses itself, makes me smell nice.” He grinned quite smugly at that and Rose grinned back.
“So that’s why you never shower!” she laughed. “I always wondered how you kept yourself so clean and didn’t need to change or anythin’.”
“Well now you know,” he said simply but Rose could feel him tensing beneath her touch. She guessed it wouldn’t be long now before he wriggled out of her embrace and changed the subject to something else. Seizing the opportunity while she still could, she pressed her hands over his lapels to still him and dove right on in.
“So...why’d you freak out with the sandwich?” she asked, then tried to guess his answer. “Is it cos...well it’d feel a bit like cannibalism to you wouldn’t it?”
“Oh I didn’t even realise what it was until it was just about in my mouth,” the Doctor slipped out of her embrace easily as he spoke and leaned back up against the railing. “Scared me right bloody silly.”
Rose leaned up next to him, concerned at his choice of words. “It scared you?”
“Welll...” he tugged at his ear and then began to bluster. “Maybe not scared. I just wasn’t expecting it is all. Call it a...sensory overload. I could’ve been about to take a bite out of my own arm for all I knew. Certainly smelt like it.”
Rose burst out laughing at this and the Doctor looked pleased. “You know how smell and taste sort of overlap a bit in humans?” he said, his eyes glittering with the sort of excitement that he usually reserved for gushing over whatever new piece of amazing alien technology they had just run across in their travels.
“Yeah,” Rose said slowly.
“Well Time Lords, we’ve got dozens of senses but my brain’s clever enough I can control them all, turn them on and off when I want to – see? Means I don’t get completely overwhelmed when there’s lots going on around me and I can choose if I want to focus on a particular thing – like taste for example. Now I’ve got a similar sense of taste to you but then I’ve got all these extra bits too and they can help me to analyse what I’m tasting on a more complex...”
“That’s why you lick things!” Rose interrupted, coming to a sudden revelation of her own. “Cos you can tell what things are by how they taste. Like the blood the Sycorax had – you knew it was A-positive just by tasting it!”
“Exactly!” the Doctor enthused, glad that she was catching on. “And with so many senses working all at once that’s a lot of information to process when I could be thinking about more important things – like how to make the batteries in your mothers TV remote last forever. So!” he jabbed a finger in his chest to accentuate his point. “Most of my senses related to taste and smell are in shut down while I’m focusing on other things – say, like fixing your mothers remote. When they switch back on again getting ready to enjoy the delicious snack your mother has prepared for us...wham!”
Rose jumped as he slammed his hand down on the railing, setting the metal shivering from the impact.
“Suddenly I’m focusing on the smell of the honey – and you know how sometimes you can taste smells? Can humans taste smells?” he looked thoughtful.
“Yeah sor’ of,” Rose confirmed. “So...it just gave you a shock?”
“Like somebody had shoved a Time Lord right underneath my nose,” the Doctor said, some of his enthusiasm faltering. “’Course it’s not quite the same but...still.”
They fell into a brooding silence and Rose automatically reached out and placed a hand over his, squeezing gently.
“You really miss them still.” She said softly, not even bothering to make it a question.
He nodded his assent and even just from his profile Rose could see the age and pain in his features.
“Always.”
Rose dropped her eyes to where her hand covered his. It seemed like such a feeble gesture when he was hurting like this but there wasn’t much more that she could offer him. He was just so very broken – even underneath the mask of his younger face and bubbly personality she could feel the weight of it. And all she could do to make him feel better was hold his hand and tell him that it was okay – a pretty distraction from the terrible things that were in his past.
“Doctor,” she said and he inclined his head to let her know he was listening. “I know that I’m not a Time Lord an’ I can never really understand what it’s like for you without bein’ one but...”
“I wouldn’t ever want you to be a Time Lord Rose,” he interrupted. “Being human is what makes you so brilliant.”
“A shop girl from London?” Rose said derisively.
“A brilliant shop girl from London who has saved my life more times than I care to count.” the Doctor corrected her and Rose was momentarily stunned into silence by his sincerity. “I’d be long dead without you Rose.”
“But you’re still so...sad.” she pressed in a small voice. “An’ I want to help but...”
“But you do,” he said, seemingly surprised that she would feel like she didn’t. “Every day. I’ve not been this happy in a long time Rose and that’s got so much to do with you.” He chuckled suddenly. “That and you keep me in line when I start to act like an arrogant berk. There’s not many people who’ve been able to do that to me – in any of my incarnations.”
Rose scoffed. “You’re jus’ saying that.”
“Am I?” he said with a sly grin and turned his hand over to twine his fingers into hers. “Well if that’s what you want to believe then you keep on believing it. In the meantime we’d better get back or your mother’ll send out a search party.”
Rose allowed him to tug her back down to her mothers flat and they entered hand in hand. Jackie glanced over them once, eyes lingering on their joined hands and then she stood and offered up the tray of sandwiches to them.
“I made some more with marmalade and no butter,” she said anxiously. “Just in case you were allergic.”
The Doctor paused, eyeing the tray with something very close to awe before turning to Rose, back to the tray, then looking up at Jackie who jumped as he laughed out loud and crossed the room in two long strides to squeeze her around the middle. Jackie squeaked indignantly as he hugged her and when he released her she glared and straightened her jacket.
“Oh marmalade is brilliant,” he said, snagging a sandwich and plopping down onto the couch. “Thank you Jackie.”
“Barmy bloody alien,” Jackie muttered as she sat down again.
Rose joined the Doctor on the couch and watched as he licked his fingers clean, wiped his fingers off on his coat and then took her hand again with a grin.
“Never thought I’d say this,” he said to the room at large. “But I really like coming here to visit.”
He reached for another sandwich and settled contentedly into the couch before launching into an animated story about how he had once saved an entire civilisation using a paint ball gun loaded up with marmalade. Jackie looked quite unimpressed with the story but the Doctor barely noticed. His eyes were alight and his hands lively with expression as he spoke and Rose watched him with a deep sense of contentment.
He was right, she thought. He did seem happier now than he ever had before – and what was better was that his happiness didn’t seem linked to whether they were travelling or saving the universe or just stopping in for a cup of tea with her mum. He seemed content wherever he was – as long as he was with her.
Maybe he hadn’t been lying before out on the balcony to make her feel better. She marvelled at the thought that she could make this amazingly brilliant man – alien, whatever – feel better just by being with him. Just by being her.
Squeezing his hand lightly she sighed and prayed that she would be enough for him.
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG
Characters: Ten, Rose, Jackie
Genre: angst, fluff
Spoilers: Set somewhere between Love and Monsters and Fear Her.
Summary: On one of their trip back to Earth to visit Jackie, the Doctor has a strange reaction to the sandwiches she serves up for them and Rose follows him to make sure he’s alright.
Disclaimer: Doctor Who and all associated characters/situations etc do not belong to me, I’m just borrowing them. Also, Time Lords do smell like honey according to this site which is pretty bloody comprehensive so I'm going to go with it.
“It’s a bit nice isn’t it?”
Rose Tyler’s brow puckered as she leant against her the doorway to her mothers kitchen, arms and legs crossed nonchalantly. “What’s nice?”
“You two coming to visit me all the time,” Jackie said fondly as she slathered a knife with butter and began spreading it liberally onto the bread she’d lined up across the counter. “He never used to like visiting when he was old big ears.”
“He was different then,” Rose shrugged and glanced over her shoulder at the Doctor who was methodically pulling apart the television remote, specs on and tongue between his teeth. “He doesn’t seem to mind doin’…domestic stuff so much now.”
“Domestic?” Jackie scoffed as she put the butter away and set to the honey jar with rather more force than necessary. Several pieces of bread began to break apart as she slapped the condiment across them. “Like an alien can be taught to be more human! You make him sound like he’s some sort of stray cat you’ve brought in off the street.”
“But he is.” Rose insisted and Jackie paused in her sandwich preparation to stare. “More human I mean, not like a stray cat.” Rose clarified as Jackie began pressing pieces of bread together.
“Well I can’t complain about havin’ you round a bit more.” she said as she transferred the sandwiches she’d made onto a tray and heading into the lounge room. “Though I could do with a bit more warning – I’ve got nothing in the house. And,” she added pointedly to the Doctor. “I could also do with a bit less of him tryin’ to break the TV remote.”
The Doctor glanced up vaguely at this pointed address and then returned to his work.
“It’s just a simple little upgrade.” he said as he aimed his sonic screwdriver at the battery compartment. “Nothing for to worry about.”
“What like the upgrade you gave the microwave last time?” Jackie demanded as she plopped down into the nearest chair. “It nearly burnt the whole flat down!”
“I told you not to cook asparagus in there.” the Doctor said curtly, making a supreme effort to try and concentrate on his work whilst Jackie began to berate him, the two of them talking one on top of the other.
“You did not! An’ you never told me…”
“I did so! Jackie Tyler…”
“…that it’d melt my favourite Tupperware container either! Don’t know how Rose puts up with you, blowing things up all the time...”
“I told you in no uncertain terms that you shouldn’t put asparagu-and who says I blow things up…?”
Rose tuned the two of them out as they bickered and reached for a sandwich. Hoping to reconcile the two of them before they really got going she pushed the tray down the coffee table towards them as a peace offering.
“You two gonna eat somethin’?” she asked. “Or are you just gonna bicker like a pair of kids all afternoon?”
“Oh no thanks sweetheart I just had lunch,” Jackie said, demeanor changing instantly. “These are all for you two.”
Rose choked on a mouthful. “Mum there’s enough sandwiches here to feed an army!”
“Close your mouth while you’re eating,” Jackie chided her daughter automatically. “I don’t want to see your food thanks very much.”
The Doctor grinned at Rose’s face as she chewed the rest of her mouthful sulkily.
“Why exactly did you make so many sandwiches?” he asked.
“What, with the way you eat?” Jackie scoffed.
“Oi!”
“Well it’s true!” Jackie told him. “I’ve never seen anyone eat like you do. Don’t know where you put it all, you’re that skinny. Bottomless pit is what you are.”
“No such thing as a bottomless pit,” the Doctor corrected her even as he put down the TV remote and his sonic and reached for a sandwich. “And I should know – I’ve fallen down a fair few in my…”
He froze suddenly, sandwich not quite touching his lips and the smile on his face dropped instantly.
Rose stopped eating too, sensing the change in his demeanour almost immediately. “Doctor?” she said gently as he pulled the sandwich away from his mouth and stared at it like it was poisoned. “You alright?”
“What?” he blinked and then abruptly put the sandwich down. “Oh course I’m alright. Just...need a bit of fresh air is all. Might go for a quick walk. Don’t go anywhere – I’ll be back!”
As he spoke he sprang to his feet and backed hurriedly out of the room. Seconds later the front door clicked open and then shut again with rather more force than was necessary.
The two women sat in stunned silence for a moment before Jackie finally spoke up.
“What the hell was that about?” she wondered. “He’s a bit...flaky now isn’t he?”
“He’s not flaky mum.” Rose defended him instantly, rising to her feet. “I’d better go make sure he’s alright.”
“Maybe he doesn’t like multigrain?” Jackie said thoughtfully, eyeing the discarded sandwich. “He’s not allergic to butter or something daft is he?”
Rose did her best not to roll her eyes. “Mum.”
“Oh alright,” Jackie sighed and waved her daughter away. “Just make sure you come say goodbye before you go swanning off again in that machine of his.”
“I will.” Rose promised, bending down to kiss her mother on the cheek. “Promise.”
At the door Rose paused and glanced back down the hall to where her mother was surveying her newly tinkered-with television remote suspiciously. Smiling, Rose slipped outside and glanced up and down the balcony.
The Doctor hadn’t gone far, only retreating a short way down the balcony before he had stopped. He was leaning against the railing with one foot crossed over the other with his eyes focused on some faraway point. As she padded down to lean up against the railing with him his eyes came back into focus briefly before glazing over again and she knew that he was aware of her.
“Alright?” she said after a moment and he nodded curtly. Uncertain as to where to go from there, Rose blurted. “Mum wanted to know if you were allergic to butter.”
The Doctor turned to her, one eyebrow raised. “Seriously?”
“Seriously.” Rose said, trying her best not to smile and failing as he broke into a grin. They laughed together quietly for a moment, both caught up in the ridiculousness of the situation.
“I’m not allergic to butter,” the Doctor said finally, sobering slightly. “That’s not...” trailing off, he shuffled his feet awkwardly and then drummed his fingers against the metal railing. “Never mind.”
“Well if it wasn’t the butter then it must’ve been the bread,” Rose teased gently, bumping his shoulder in an effort to try and soften him up. “Am I right? Don’t like multigrain? All those little bits getting stuck in your teeth...”
“It was the honey,” the Doctor interrupted unexpectedly. Glanced sideways at her. Stared back out at nothing. “It took me by surprise is all, I wasn’t...expecting it.”
Rose paused to process this new information. “You’re...allergic to honey?”
The Doctor laughed softly and his eyes dropped to his hands as he shook his head. “No.”
“Well what then?”
He turned and considered her briefly. “Have you ever smelt me?”
Rose couldn’t help herself. She stared at him, mouth hanging slightly open. Of all the things he could have said to her she certainly hadn’t been expecting that.
“Well?” he prompted and Rose snapped out of her reverie.
“Well not like...deliberately or anythin’,” she mumbled. “I mean sometimes when we hug I sor’ of...you know. But not...I mean I don’t go round sniffing your shirts or anythin’.”
He eyed her a little strangely at the last comment but then he turned and spread his arms wide as though to embrace her and nodded his consent.
“Smell me.”
Rose goggled at him. “Serious?”
“Serious.” he said and waited patiently while she dithered awkwardly in front of him, uncertain as to how exactly she should go about fulfilling his request. After several seconds had passed and she still hadn’t made a move, he tried for a joke. “I don’t bite.”
Rose laughed and, awkwardness breaking down, she stepped forward to put her arms around him and drew him into a hug, pressing her face against the soft lapel of his brown coat.
“Now,” the Doctor said, wrapping his arms around her in turn. “What do I smell like to you?”
Feeling ridiculous, Rose breathed in deeply.
“Like...fabric softener,” she began. “Um...sor’ of...metally? And like the inside of the TARDIS – like...like time and stars I...dunno how else to...um...an’ dust? You smell like dust an’ books.”
“What else?” he prompted and Rose breathed in again tentatively.
“I...I dunno,” she faltered and tried to pull away but he tightened his hold on her slightly and touched the back of her head. “Doctor?”
“Try here,” he said and tilted her head so that her nose was pressed into his neck and suddenly an impossibly sweet smell filled her senses.
“Honey!” she blurted, surprised. “I never really noticed before but...you do, you smell like honey!”
“Welll...it’s not quite the same,” he consented, letting his arms drop enough that she could pull back and look up at him. “But yes it is a very similar scent to honey.”
“I never even realised,” Rose shook her head in amazement. “I mean, I guess you always smelt sor’ of...sweet but I never realised...”
“It’s my hormones.” he told her. “Or at least the Time Lord equivalent or hormones. It’s also part of the reason why I don’t sweat much – my body automatically cleanses itself, makes me smell nice.” He grinned quite smugly at that and Rose grinned back.
“So that’s why you never shower!” she laughed. “I always wondered how you kept yourself so clean and didn’t need to change or anythin’.”
“Well now you know,” he said simply but Rose could feel him tensing beneath her touch. She guessed it wouldn’t be long now before he wriggled out of her embrace and changed the subject to something else. Seizing the opportunity while she still could, she pressed her hands over his lapels to still him and dove right on in.
“So...why’d you freak out with the sandwich?” she asked, then tried to guess his answer. “Is it cos...well it’d feel a bit like cannibalism to you wouldn’t it?”
“Oh I didn’t even realise what it was until it was just about in my mouth,” the Doctor slipped out of her embrace easily as he spoke and leaned back up against the railing. “Scared me right bloody silly.”
Rose leaned up next to him, concerned at his choice of words. “It scared you?”
“Welll...” he tugged at his ear and then began to bluster. “Maybe not scared. I just wasn’t expecting it is all. Call it a...sensory overload. I could’ve been about to take a bite out of my own arm for all I knew. Certainly smelt like it.”
Rose burst out laughing at this and the Doctor looked pleased. “You know how smell and taste sort of overlap a bit in humans?” he said, his eyes glittering with the sort of excitement that he usually reserved for gushing over whatever new piece of amazing alien technology they had just run across in their travels.
“Yeah,” Rose said slowly.
“Well Time Lords, we’ve got dozens of senses but my brain’s clever enough I can control them all, turn them on and off when I want to – see? Means I don’t get completely overwhelmed when there’s lots going on around me and I can choose if I want to focus on a particular thing – like taste for example. Now I’ve got a similar sense of taste to you but then I’ve got all these extra bits too and they can help me to analyse what I’m tasting on a more complex...”
“That’s why you lick things!” Rose interrupted, coming to a sudden revelation of her own. “Cos you can tell what things are by how they taste. Like the blood the Sycorax had – you knew it was A-positive just by tasting it!”
“Exactly!” the Doctor enthused, glad that she was catching on. “And with so many senses working all at once that’s a lot of information to process when I could be thinking about more important things – like how to make the batteries in your mothers TV remote last forever. So!” he jabbed a finger in his chest to accentuate his point. “Most of my senses related to taste and smell are in shut down while I’m focusing on other things – say, like fixing your mothers remote. When they switch back on again getting ready to enjoy the delicious snack your mother has prepared for us...wham!”
Rose jumped as he slammed his hand down on the railing, setting the metal shivering from the impact.
“Suddenly I’m focusing on the smell of the honey – and you know how sometimes you can taste smells? Can humans taste smells?” he looked thoughtful.
“Yeah sor’ of,” Rose confirmed. “So...it just gave you a shock?”
“Like somebody had shoved a Time Lord right underneath my nose,” the Doctor said, some of his enthusiasm faltering. “’Course it’s not quite the same but...still.”
They fell into a brooding silence and Rose automatically reached out and placed a hand over his, squeezing gently.
“You really miss them still.” She said softly, not even bothering to make it a question.
He nodded his assent and even just from his profile Rose could see the age and pain in his features.
“Always.”
Rose dropped her eyes to where her hand covered his. It seemed like such a feeble gesture when he was hurting like this but there wasn’t much more that she could offer him. He was just so very broken – even underneath the mask of his younger face and bubbly personality she could feel the weight of it. And all she could do to make him feel better was hold his hand and tell him that it was okay – a pretty distraction from the terrible things that were in his past.
“Doctor,” she said and he inclined his head to let her know he was listening. “I know that I’m not a Time Lord an’ I can never really understand what it’s like for you without bein’ one but...”
“I wouldn’t ever want you to be a Time Lord Rose,” he interrupted. “Being human is what makes you so brilliant.”
“A shop girl from London?” Rose said derisively.
“A brilliant shop girl from London who has saved my life more times than I care to count.” the Doctor corrected her and Rose was momentarily stunned into silence by his sincerity. “I’d be long dead without you Rose.”
“But you’re still so...sad.” she pressed in a small voice. “An’ I want to help but...”
“But you do,” he said, seemingly surprised that she would feel like she didn’t. “Every day. I’ve not been this happy in a long time Rose and that’s got so much to do with you.” He chuckled suddenly. “That and you keep me in line when I start to act like an arrogant berk. There’s not many people who’ve been able to do that to me – in any of my incarnations.”
Rose scoffed. “You’re jus’ saying that.”
“Am I?” he said with a sly grin and turned his hand over to twine his fingers into hers. “Well if that’s what you want to believe then you keep on believing it. In the meantime we’d better get back or your mother’ll send out a search party.”
Rose allowed him to tug her back down to her mothers flat and they entered hand in hand. Jackie glanced over them once, eyes lingering on their joined hands and then she stood and offered up the tray of sandwiches to them.
“I made some more with marmalade and no butter,” she said anxiously. “Just in case you were allergic.”
The Doctor paused, eyeing the tray with something very close to awe before turning to Rose, back to the tray, then looking up at Jackie who jumped as he laughed out loud and crossed the room in two long strides to squeeze her around the middle. Jackie squeaked indignantly as he hugged her and when he released her she glared and straightened her jacket.
“Oh marmalade is brilliant,” he said, snagging a sandwich and plopping down onto the couch. “Thank you Jackie.”
“Barmy bloody alien,” Jackie muttered as she sat down again.
Rose joined the Doctor on the couch and watched as he licked his fingers clean, wiped his fingers off on his coat and then took her hand again with a grin.
“Never thought I’d say this,” he said to the room at large. “But I really like coming here to visit.”
He reached for another sandwich and settled contentedly into the couch before launching into an animated story about how he had once saved an entire civilisation using a paint ball gun loaded up with marmalade. Jackie looked quite unimpressed with the story but the Doctor barely noticed. His eyes were alight and his hands lively with expression as he spoke and Rose watched him with a deep sense of contentment.
He was right, she thought. He did seem happier now than he ever had before – and what was better was that his happiness didn’t seem linked to whether they were travelling or saving the universe or just stopping in for a cup of tea with her mum. He seemed content wherever he was – as long as he was with her.
Maybe he hadn’t been lying before out on the balcony to make her feel better. She marvelled at the thought that she could make this amazingly brilliant man – alien, whatever – feel better just by being with him. Just by being her.
Squeezing his hand lightly she sighed and prayed that she would be enough for him.
